Christian Dating's Top 5 Myths and Misconceptions
Join the largest Christian dating site. Sign up for free and connect with other Christian singles looking for love based on faith. Join the #1 trusted Christian dating site in the US. Register for free today to start seeing your matches with other Christian singles!. Oct 23, At the opposite extreme, there is “Faux Christian Dating”—in which young Christians have no idea what to do with dating, so they avoid it.
Christian Dating Rule 3: Use social media wisely For those who think that Christian dating rules should eschew all social media as a means of authentic connection, think again. That is certainly not what is being prescribed here. The truth is, more exclusive platforms with a superior vetting and matching system can bring together Christian singles from all corners of the country in a soulmate meeting that might otherwise have never happened.
As many mediums as there are, God works through them all.
However, one must also acknowledge the perils of technology and social media in particular. So all good Christian dating advice has to consider what kinds of interactions technology is being used support.
It can be easy to like, comment and tweet at a whole range of singles at once and so it exacerbates a less pure form of how singles are approaching each other today. However, if there is a real and stated sense of the fact that a man is pursuing a woman with the intent of a desire to establish a relationship and, furthermore, wants to make the commitment public knowledge, then that is a more than acceptable use of the social media medium.
Christian dating Rule 4: Stay open to a friendship blossoming into something more One of the best pieces of Christian dating advice is something that not only Christian singles can benefit from: This is friendship that starts off between a man and a woman as a shared collection of interests, invitations to community and fellowship events or through discipleships.
Even when meeting online, once you move to a local context, compatibility can only grow deeper. The only thing to remember is this: Christian Dating Rule 5: So a good rule of thumb is to use marriage as a yardstick: Christian Dating Rule 6: In the Song of Solomon, the desire to be physically close and intimate is inevitable and even beautiful. Here, Christian singles can turn to Scripture, once again, for an idea of how to navigate through modern dating.
Staying sexually pure during dating is common sense for those who hold a high regard of godliness. In the Song of Solomon 1: If guys and girls act standoffish around one another at church, how are they ever going to date?
If romantic relationships are, at their core, friendshipsthen how can Christians start one when they feel like they're not allowed to be friends? Should guys just make their intentions clear from the beginning? Would you be interested in grabbing coffee? But I think for most Christians, this approach feels too forward and even a bit creepy. Some Christians think romance in the church should just happen naturally.
Brief chats should lead to a social media connection, which leads to a flirty facebook comment, text messages, etc.
The Top Five Myths of Christian Dating
But if you ever take this approach, you better be careful. Interactions like this will draw unwanted attention from your church. Your friends will tease you "so what's going on there? Your small group will question you "are you being wise? And all this interrogation makes things weird before anything even happened. Perhaps the most popular way guys and girls really get to know each other in the church is by serving in a ministry together.
I mean, how many wedding testimonies have you heard where the groom first noticed his wife after serving with her side-by-side? In other words, our Christian sub-culture has created a very limited context for guys and girls to naturally interact with one another. And any interaction outside of this limited context ends up feeling inappropriate.
The Problems With the Church's Dating Context This is a shame because I think as a result of guys and girls being so cautious with one another, a couple of problems arise.
And since friendship is the essence of marriage, we often tell them they should be friends with someone before ever marrying them.
Why Christian Dating is Really Awkward
However, we also tell them that they should be weary about opposite-sex friendships. Simply put, this is what Christians are hearing: Should we be shocked when they look for romance online or end up seeing a non-Christian?
Have we made the church an unappealing arena to find a dance partner? By no means am I saying that the church should be seen as some kind of dating meat-market. It's weird if people mainly visited your Sunday worship in order to find a mate. But if we make it really weird to find ever find one in the community, we should expect our members to look elsewhere. Again, I understand why guys and girls need to approach friendships with each other differently.
But this shouldn't mean the two sexes should always sit together in opposite sides of the church like some kind of middle school dance. After all, God created the church to be filled with both men and women. We reflect the body of Christ not by attending church together but by relating and ministering to one another. But this image is tainted when the genders avoid one another.
Why Christian Dating is Really Awkward — Tom Talks
How else can we truly refer to each other as brothers and sisters in Christ? As I mentioned earlier, this is a social riddle that plagues every social circle. But I think the church perpetuates the problem by drawing sharp, seemingly holy distinctions that, in my mind, looks kind of silly.
And I'm not necessarily saying that guys and girls at church need to loosen up and start hanging out one-on-one.